sometimes, everything in one's power is not enough. sometimes, i'm my worst enemy. at the juncture of a spectacular failure, of an end that didn't have to be, an end to the life i wanted. all i can do now is shed a few jars of angry tears then gather the pieces, hold them closer, and march forward...
because time is lived in one direction ...because i fought as best i knew how ...because even if i were to puzzle together the girl i want to be from these fragments, she would still require inhabiting to cement her.
in the mean time: the longest night of this year was pregnant with stars; the Garden State soundtrack has just enough angst, just enough guilt, just enough sadness sprinkled with hope to allow soaking in heartbreak without despair; and finally, tea and knitting make things better, for a little while.
Alishan Oolong & knitting, Far Leaves Tea
I'm sorry you are dealing with whatever it is on your shoulders. I wish you moments of peace and beauty over the holidays and the coming year.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about your sadness... wishing you well thru the holiday and the new year.
ReplyDeletesending a giant hug your way. i absolutely agree with you on the garden state soundtrack - it helped me through many a long night filled with sad angry tears.
ReplyDelete"pregnant with stars"- i like that. it's always so sweet how even in the darkest times, we can still see and appreciate beauty.
happy holidays, mg!